Hi, welcome! Today I am going to talk about how children learn social behaviors, especially how they learn lessons from the family, which is the most basic unit of our social structure. There is a lot of discussion these days about how families are changing and whether non-traditional families have a good or bad effect on children. But it’s important to remember that the type of a family a child comes from is not nearly as important as the kind of love and support that exists in a home. There are three ways by which children acquire their behavior, through rewards, punishments and finally modeling. In today’s lecture, let’s first discuss rewards.
A reward can be defined as a positive reinforcement for good behavior. An example of a reward is when a parent says if you eat your vegetables you can have ice-cream for dessert or parent might say finish your homework first then you can watch TV. Most parents use rewards unconsciously because they want their children to behave well. For example, a parent might give a gift to a child because the child behaved well or parents might give a child money for doing what the parents asked.
15. What is discussed in the lecture?
16. According to the talk, what is more important for children to learn good social behaviors?
17. There are three ways by which children acquire their behavior. Which one is discussed in detail in the talk?
18. Which of the following is not a positive reinforcement for a good behavior?
We all have problems and barriers that block our progress or prevent us from moving into new areas. Our problems might include the fears of speaking in front of a group, anxiety about math problems, or the reluctance to sound silly, trying to speak a foreign language. It’s natural to have problems and barriers, but sometimes they limit our experience so much we get bored with life. When that happens, consider the following three ways of dealing with problem or barrier. One way is to pretend it doesn’t exist, avoid it, deny it and lie about it. It’s like turning your head the other way, putting on a fake grin and saying, see, there is really no problem at all, everything is fine. In addition to looking foolish, this approach leaves the barrier intact and we keep a bumping into it. So the second approach is to fight the barrier, to struggle against it, this usually makes the barrier grow. It increases the barriers magnitude. A person who is obsessed with weight might constantly worry about being fat. He might struggle with it every day, trying diet after diet and the more he struggles, the bigger the problem gets. The third alternative is to love the barrier, accept it, totally experience it, tell the truth about it, describe it in detail. Applying these processes is easier, if you remember two ideas. First, loving a problem is not necessarily the same as enjoying it. Loving, this sense, means total and unconditional acceptance. Second, unconditional acceptance is not the same as unconditional surrender. Accepting a problem is different from giving up or escaping from it. Rather, this process involves escaping into the problem, diving into it head first and getting to know it in detail. Often the most effective solutions come , when we face a problem squarely with eyes wide open, then we can move through the problem instead of around it. When you are willing to love your problems, you drain them as much as their energy.